Here Be Monsters

I read a book a couple years back that changes my life. I don't think it mattered so much what the book was as what I was going through when I read it. I was looking for something, or not looking, but expecting, and I picked up one of many good books I could have picked up and there it was; exactly what I didn't know I had been expecting.

I think that's how it is with everything, with books, religion, friends, it is less about them and always about us. I think as people we are always looking for something whether or not we know it and because of that we find it in something else and that something else takes responsibility for what we were looking for, it represents finding and keeping what we need.

I think because there are so many books to pick up or people to meet we are always finding what we are looking for and not knowing it and this makes us happy.

We find what we need, externalise it and make it a part of us. Then we go on looking, but in a subtle way that can never be disappointing. I like that.

The book was Here be Monsters by Collin Cheney.

Happy holidays

Shorts

Boys are stupid, and girls are crazy. I've posted it a thousand times before. But what if the boy is crazy? does that make the girl stupid?

I feel like alice on her head when the whole world grows huge. Except Alice had it easy, she had a rabbit to fallow and mushrooms to eat, which is more of a plan then I have got.

I love the holidays, I love the decorations and the food and the tradition. The holidays feel like home no matter where I am. I am home this year, or at least as close to home as I've been in many years. Again I find myself alone in a new place; and again I am overwhelmed with both excitement and loneliness at the idea.

If you find yourself needing more holiday cheer, just pop on the Sufjan Stevens Christmas collection. It's just that good.

Holiday parties

Not Much

I'm still feeling rather turned inside out, which has kept me from posting because who wants a wingy blog? Regardless, life seems to be settling down a bit (finally) and I am getting back into the swing of things. Adult life is still adult life and I still always have too much to do at work and not enough time to cook proper meals or even go shopping for proper food. Being single has lent itself more towards embroidery then going out which is a bit pathetic but also quite productive. I've been working on a lovely little mushroom series and don't even have to put on make up.

Kerplam

It's astonishing how fast things change, how fast people change, how fast relationships change, how fast your whole life can be shaken upside down. The problem is, I'm not so sure how to get myself right side up anymore. I was standing here with my life properly set up and running along on it's own when KERPLAM, the whole thing fell sideways, shook around a bit and landed upside down.

My next project

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To the West

Directly to the west, the earth rises up on itself in rocky sheets flowing one after another in deep reds and lush greens of harsh but sustainable life. To the east the land is flat and occupied only by tall grasses and shopping centers. The land stretches out flat for what seems like forever. What a strange corner of the world this is where the flat earth rises abruptly upwards with no warning and no regret. I drove here flat across the country through endless stretches of barren fields until reaching this lush wall of climbing mountains like a mirage. What a place to begin anew. What a reminder of of balance, never truly attained but strived for nonetheless.

I has my Katie-muffin.

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This is me, living in my lab

The trouble with having a job is that it constantly interferes with the things I want to do, and often with the things I need to do. Luckily it does not interfere with my ability to post over-dramatic obvious statements on the internet. oh the joys of mobile blogging... I don't think I've cleaned the house or even folded laundry in over a week. Luckily my roommate is as busy (if not busier) then I am and so the house is able to fall to complete disarray without any blame. I haven't done a proper food shop in weeks and am scrounging through my kitchen (and lets be honest, through what John brings over to share) daily to find meals. I have however, organized the lab, set up the microscope and inoculation stations under the newly sealed fume hood, run countless cultures and inoculations, sterilized EVERYTHING and documented it all with endless paperwork. Since I get to work before anyone else in the office I have taken to putting on make up and doing my hair in the work bathroom and eating breakfast in the break room all while my equipment heats up. I wonder how feasible it is to set up a cot in my office and just move in.

Positivity

I really do love my job, I love my office and my strange mid-western indoor plants which I have named Doris and Watson. My office is an actual office, with a door and a window and a large wooden desk with far too many drawers. The lab is slightly less exciting but it's all mine and so no one gets to mess with my obsessive organization or complain about my music. I really enjoy that I wear a lab coat because it makes me feel important and official (mostly it keeps me from getting bleach on my clothes).

parenting

Remember a few years back when it seemed everyone remotely famous was seen carying around a small adorable child? They were, and still are, the trendiest of fashon accessories. If the last couple of weeks have taught me anything, it is that a baby destroys every outfit you put together within a matter of secconds. Sure, you might look cute and mature with that little bundle of joy on your hip, but it should be taken into consideration that your dress is about to to be spit up on or publicly ripped in two.

Adult Life

I feel like a little girl again dressed up in my mums heels and pearls except I'm not wearing heels or pearls. I'm wearing a teal pencil skirt that makes me look exceptionally knock kneed (I am nock kneed) and has a bit of room below the waist where I imagine hips would go if I had any. And I'm wearing keds, exactly like when I was a little girl. I'm wearing support hose under my wool tights because I have this condition that causes my blood pressure to drop for no reason and I'm less likely to pass out if I keep as much blood as possible in my torso out of my legs. This does not help that whole knock kneed business and pinches a bit when I walk. I got here early to make a good impression but the company doesn't open till 9 and the door is locked so I'm sitting outside in the hall like I would waiting for the bell in high school. I should have picked up a coffee but I wanted to give the impression I'm a morning person, which I hope to someday be.

Heading west

I am not a writer, something which surely has been made clear by my writing. Luckily for me (and less luckily for all of you) blogging does not require any writing skills. Today I packed up the car, cleaned my empty apartment, found several unnecessary items I assumed I had lost over the past year and started driving. Graduating seems more like surviving then anything to be proud of, but either way I am thrilled to be leaving Bard. I warned you that I liked lists, and since I am not sure how this road trip is going to go I am starting out with these few statements. LET'S HAVE ADVENTURES